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semisober :: drinking quotes & drug and alcohol quotes
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You can't be a Real Country unless you have A BEER and an airline -- it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa

Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
P.J. O'Rourke

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
Kaiser Wilhelm

Cover a war in a place where you can't drink beer or talk to a woman? Hell no!
Hunter S. Thompson
(on the US war against Iraq)

There is an ancient Celtic axiom that says 'Good people drink good beer.' Which is true, then as now. Just look around you in any public barroom and you will quickly see: Bad people drink bad beer. Think about it.
Hunter S. Thompson

I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's as good as you're going to feel all day.
Dean Martin

One more drink and I'd be under the host.
Dorothy Parker

All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow.
Dave Barry

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
Dave Barry

I like beer. On occasion, I will even drink beer to celebrate a major event such as the fall of communism or the fact that the refrigerator is still working.
Dave Barry

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.
Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
Dave Barry

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

Life is too short to drink cheap beer.

I prefer both my beer and my coffee to be dark and bitter; that way, they fit in so well with the rest of my life.

Beer - it's not just for breakfast anymore

Beer: Nature's laxative.

Beer. If you can't taste it, why bother!

Beauty lies in the hands of the beerholder.

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.

Friends don't let friends drink Light Beer.

If nothing beats a Bud, given the choice, I'd take the nothing...